HUZZAH!!! The lamp is properly assembled and positioned in its proper place to illuminate an otherwise-dim corner of my living room. I really like the way the tinted light shining through the shades enhances the appearance of the artwork in that area (all but the large print of the butterflies are things I painted).
I’m VERY thankful my dad stopped by and got it in working order.
I’m also grateful to my daughter for encouraging me to reach out to a friend with whom I haven’t spoken since the summer. I’m not sure what will happen there, but I feel good about saying something, finally, as to why I flaked on plans and didn’t respond when she asked what had come up.
I feel awkward and out of place a lot. Some of that may just be anxiety, but I think I’ve felt at least a touch of this for a very, very long time. When I was younger, though, I had a sense of non-conformist pride about it. Now, it more often than not makes me sad and anxious.
I have a solid tribe of friends all over that I met online, but I could do with more local peeps for activities and adventures. It seems, however, like there’s always a drifting apart.
Part of that could be me. What feels like healthy boundary-setting one day seems overly harsh on another. Maybe sometimes I come down too hard on people, only to later change my mind. I can be rather defensive and difficult to get close to in a meaningful way. I don’t make it easy. It doesn’t feel easy from my side of things, either, but I’m working on it.
My butterfly painting reminds me of a meme circulating about how caterpillars turn into a pile of goo inside their chrysalis before emerging as butterflies, so if you’re a mess and wrapped in blankets, don’t feel so bad (or something like that). Here’s to positive transformation, complicated and messy as it may be.
All the Bright and Sparkly Things 
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