Heading into Mother’s Day Weekend

I have received bonus mothering from so many women over the course of my life– female friends, the moms of my friends, female supervisors who always had my back or knew just when to step in with an “atta girl” as needed, long-distance online friends, my long-distance bestie who I did meet in person once…

To say nothing of the endless amount of gratitude I have for the kiddo who made me a mom in the first place…

This morning, I was headed to work and stopped at a drive thru.

The cashier asked, “Are you a mommy?”

I said I was.

“Happy Mother’s Day,” she said with a warm smile.

I placed a hand over my heart and thanked her, tears in my eyes.

She mimicked my gesture and said, “You’re welcome.”

It’s not easy being so far away from kiddo around holidays and birthdays etc; however, to help kind of cushion that emotional blow, I sent her a little money so she could buy herself one of the fancy indie nail polishes she likes, and order me a surprise book off my To Be Read (Once Acquired) Amazon list. I wanted her to be able to treat herself, too. And money is very tight for her at the moment, and she couldn’t have afforded to give me a gift without a little help. Which is okay.

And I already got MY mom a cute pop-up card (pictured here… shhhhh it’s a surprise– an inside reference to a neighbor who once offered her a free tattoo… and I may enclose a temporary tattoo with it).

AND I took her out to eat already AND got her those Bath & Body Works foaming hand soaps AND got her a mini cake from Starbucks today AND I bought her surprise chocolate covered strawberries which I will give to her at some point… and I’m going to pick up some roses from me and kiddo.

Here’s the cake, though a bit of the pineapple goodness fell off in the itty bitty pastry bag on the way home.

Another shout-out to my daughter’s boyfriend’s mom, for all the help she’s given the both of them since kiddo moved down South so they could be together. It was great really meeting all his family, and spending time with him and his brothers, and such, when my mom and I visited last summer.

Lastly, MY mom. Thank you, Mom, for the little moments when you knock it out of the park, like when you recently said, “I love you, and I don’t want you to be sad” when I found out kiddo might have to cut her trip up here a day short to accommodate attendance expectations from her job.

So we’re looking at 2 full days together over the weekend, versus 3. Maybe that seems like a small thing, but when this may be it for the whole rest of the year, it’s a lot. And I haven’t seen her since last July.

I’m trying my best to stay positive about all of it, permitting myself breaks to feel the feels and be sad when I really need to. Today was a pretty durned good day, and that helped a lot. And YES I have SO MANY books to read, and two from the library that I need to catch up with…. but I am looking forward to a little something picked out by my daughter.

Here’s to all the moms out there, and moms to be, and those who wish they could be moms, and anyone struggling this weekend with grief over a missing mom, or a severed relationship, or a complicated one. I hear you, I see you, I am sending you love, and virtual roses.