Filed in Pexels under “Vampire”

Most of the photoshoot the featured image was borrowed from, was shot in direct sunlight. So unless they’re like The Vampire Diaries vampires with magic jewelry, it feels a little implausible. (Not that I didn’t love Vampire Diaries. Damon = le swoon!) That being said:

I super dig this photo aesthetic. This shot in particular, since you don’t see any sunlight streaming in, directly, and the held cigarette feels so intimate. And the book. Gotta read to your luv as you hold a (shared?) cigarette to their mouth. Assuming it is just a cigarette. Who knows?

Aside: Apologies to any former smokers like myself, if this sends you into a brief tailspin of nicotine cravings. I dunno. For me, it just brings back some warm and fuzzy memories of sharing smokes with various peeps over the years.

But then I remember that as a non-smoker, cigarettes never taste/feel as good as I might imagine them to be, and I let it go. The memories are better than the reality– which could be said for a great many things, I imagine.

In other news… I was fairly quiet at work today, thinking all about watching Interview with the Vampire (AMC version) once I got home. But I wanted to blog a bit first, since I’m trying to make this a daily thing. And I think I might pop a personal pizza into the oven. I got some actually decent generic ones.

Made out like a bandit at the grocery store shopping sales and generic products. The generic breakfast sandwiches, eh, maybe the extra 40 cents or so would’ve been worth it for tastier biscuits. But I will survive, as per the song.

What the heck happened to the me that made pretty guys’ hands shake with nervousness? She’s gotta still be in there somewhere. Just remembering one guy in particular asking me if I was presently smoking or not (I was on and off with it), and his nervousness at my perceived ire that he’d been gone too long this time (he was on and off with me).

And the other bookended “one that got away”… we set each other to trembling more than once. His menu was shaking in his hands, the first time we met, when we went out to dinner.

On one ride home, we were both almost vibrating with shared anxiety.

Maybe that’s an odd trait to miss, but I feel like you wouldn’t sweat someone’s perception of you if you weren’t pretty dang invested. Though I could also just be more chill to be around these days. Hard to say.

I dunno. I got a random message from a dude into Steel Panther, on one of the dating apps today. We’ve exchanged a couple messages over a span of time but never manage to complete a thread of conversation because his replies are so spotty. So I don’t hold out much hope there. HOWEVER… Steel Panther might be fun to add to my latest playlist. That reminder made the message worth it, if nothing else.

BLAH was just about to repeat myself and write “I dunno” again. But that seems to be my general vibe about dating or AHEM “dating” as of late. I suppose I should take Baba Yaga’s advice and tend to myself and “feather the nest” as it were and just sink into my own groove and enjoy time with friends and have adventures and see where life takes me. Run-on sentence gone wild. Alas. I also had a typo on Threads today. It happens lol…

SO, for this evening, we leave the mysteries of my heart and all its layered desires unsolved, as perhaps they are intended to be, and enjoy some pizza and some vampire love. Not that it worked out so well the LAST time I tangled with someone vampire-reminiscent, but remind me again why I can’t just date a vampire? ;P

My dad once advised I treat job applications like a game. It’s a numbers game that you keep playing until you win. Is it shallow to conceive of dating the same way? Online dating certainly has that quality…. to say nothing of the head games one occasionally encounters. Not that I haven’t in my day manipulated with the best of them. But I am trying REALLY hard to avoid any disingenuous communication.

Le sigh. On to pizza and prettiness.

Super thankful I have access to both tonight. And, at least in this present moment, I’m thankful for all romantic adventures come and gone. How’s that song go? “Maybe a hundred bad days made a hundred good stories. A hundred good stories make me interesting at parties.”