I had a compelling thought about my hot guy depression dream… Maybe externalizing depression as someone I would tend to care for and nurture and feel a connection with, is my unconscious telling me to do that for myself.
After dinner tonight, I remembered something Yogi Bryan said about saying “Hi, Anxiety” and welcoming it into your meditation practice. And I think he added that you could do that with any “negative” emotion. Welcome it and feel it. Honor it.
He told a story about someone who did just that with anxiety and one day found it was gone. And at that point, he kind of missed it.
So yeah.
I hadn’t yet reached that conclusion when I went out tonight.
BUT… I did some light makeup, finger-combed my hair, changed my top (nearly also opted for metallic silver zebra stripe leggings, but I didn’t want to have to slip my shoes back on after)… and added some accessories.
Two necklaces that layer nicely together, one of which features an Evil Eye talisman, the massive Final Sale earrings I got for like $2, a bracelet with little Buddha devotional images on the wooden beads (not sure where I got that from), and two stretch bracelets with plastic skulls for beads.
And my tee was the one I got with a skull wearing heart-shaped sunglasses. Strategic rips in a few places. I layered a hot pink leopard print tank underneath.
All in all, a very good synthesis of my opposing personality traits and interests. I feel like it might make a fun date outfit. But then, it did. A date with myself. And, in theory, my hot guy depression. LOL.
Took myself out for a burger. I was waffling between a couple different restaurants but then nipped into Uber Eats to see what was on the menu lately at one of them and realized I had almost forgotten about the massive double decker burgers they had just introduced. I’d gotten an email at some point.
Had to try that. Opted for the one with avocado and onion and bacon and smashed tots and stuff. Very tasty. And the fries seemed better than usual. Not sure why? More pepper maybe?
Do we need a food pic? I suppose I could share a food pic.
I skipped the top bun and didn’t quite finish the bottom one. Had to eat it with a knife and fork. But it was pretty amazing.
While I was eating, I noticed the sun setting, still visible through the sheer shade covering the window beside me.
On my way out, I saw cotton candy skies, and a nearly-full moon. Two more days. Taking time to appreciate all the little things.
Then, I came home, and bonded with the cat a bit. Largely because she inserted herself in front of the keyboard. LOL. But I was happy to see her, too.
I have a few more goals set for today. One that I put off from yesterday. Doing my best, though. I did get TWO of yesterday’s delayed goals accomplished before I left for work this morning, so I think I deserve some credit for that.
Still have to poke into my DBT book for today, since I set that up as a daily goal in Finch. And I now have a micro pet egg riding on it. The more days I fulfill that particular goal, the sooner it will hatch into a new friend for my “birb.”
Today, my bird friend got invited to a luau. She’s in Maui. Already, she discovered white pineapple there, which apparently tastes significantly different from what one thinks a pineapple should taste like. I gave her a lei and a melon hat and some cute slide sandal slipper type things. And a popsicle to hold, to keep her cool.
Well, that’s the day’s big events and reflections.
OH.
Nearly forgot.
GRATITUDE LIST FOR TODAY:
- Luxury of an evening out, enjoying my own company and journaling while I waited for my food.
- Very kind server who reminded me of someone I once knew.
- The sheer joy of dressing up for no particular special reason other than I felt like it. Which is special enough.
- My cat waiting for me, always. Happy to see me return, bittersweetly sad to see me leave.
Suddenly I had a flashback to that scene in Pulp Fiction where Samuel L. Jackson’s character comments, “Mmmm, this is a tasty burger.” LOL.
It was, indeed, a tasty burger.
Sleep well! Sweet dreams! Until the morrow, or whenever I am next moved to post. I know I was gone for a bit there. We’ll see what I’m up to moving forward.
All the Bright and Sparkly Things 
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