This will be short. I’m tired.
(Edit to add: I should know myself better than that by now. Always verbose).
I do discuss plot elements from The Lost Boys here. It’s from 1987, so unless you’re of a different generation, there’s a good chance you’ve seen it. Maybe even then. My coworker who just graduated from high school was WELL familiar with it. All the same, potential spoilers ahead.
The first time I Googled how many times someone says “Michael” in the 1987 film The Lost Boys, Google’s AI claimed there wasn’t any exact count on record. That may be bogus. I looked online again just now. There seems to be a little disagreement?
Some sources said 114. Others claim 118.
Anyway, prior to having researched again just now, I decided to watch the film AGAIN and try to count for myself. At first, I was trying to tally up not only “Michael” vs. “Mike” and the one lone “Mikey.” I was also hoping to track which characters had said it in each scene, to help substantiate my earlier claim that David can’t seem to stop himself from calling out for Michael (somewhat joking here).
I eventually lost track of who said what, because there were several scenes where the uses of “Michael” happened so frequently and so close together. The scene where the vampires seem to be surrounding their home on motorcycles, just before Michael opens the door to find no one there, was especially tricky.
I think there were more instances of it then than what I heard. It was hard to parse through all the whispers, over the sounds of the motorcycle engines. And, it’s kind of late here, and I try not to jack up my TV volume when I stream anything after quiet hours.
In fact, there have been times I have watched entire movies or programs on mute, and just read closed captioning/subtitles. Usually, I save that for stuff I’ve already seen.
Haven’t done that in a bit. Been more lenient with myself. The TV is at least in the living room, and I wager no one else would be trying to sleep in this end of the building, either on the other side of the wall, or upstairs. The bedrooms all face the street. I still kept the volume low, though, and went even lower when scenes got loud.
Only disturbances tonight seem to have been some dogs barking, late. They sounded so sad, like they’d been left alone. They freaked the cat out some. I tried telling her it was okay, but she couldn’t help her vigilant state.
They’re quiet now.
I didn’t hear anyone come back home. I sure hope the movie wasn’t disturbing the dogs? There’s some barking in it, etc., but I’ve never had anything like that happen before. And it sounded like these dogs weren’t even in an adjoining unit.
Anyway… I counted 104 Michaels, 30 Mikes, and 1 Mikey.
So I must have missed a bunch.
But I got fairly far into the film before I gave up trying to track it by who’d spoken his name.
David and the rest of the vampires DEFINITELY say it the most.
They were WELL ahead, before I lost count.
I think with the exception of the scene where David passes him the bejeweled bottle, David is chanting Michael’s name simultaneously with the rest of the vampires, when they’re egging him on, or trying to call to him, from a distance.
David had several instances of addressing Michael by himself, so I would say he’s probably the one who says it the most. I guess that depends on whether or not I’m wrong about David joining the chorus to get Michael to drink from the bottle, and how many times the others say his name on their own in that scene, if in fact, they do.
After David, there was Sam, Michael’s brother, but Sam often calls him “Mike,” instead.
I’m a little foggy on who “won” between Star, Michael’s love interest, and Lucy, Sam and Michael’s mom. Star cried out for Michael several times in quick succession in a scene or two, and I don’t think I credited her for all of those. That may have been around when I gave up and tried just counting the names, not the speakers.
OH… I can think of one I know I missed. I’m pretty sure their grandpa calls out “Michael!” just before he asks, “Do you know the rule about filling up the car with gas when you take it without asking?” So that would be another one. As far as I can tell, that’s the only time their grandpa addresses Michael by name.
Another EDIT to add: I just tried to verify that. Maybe he doesn’t call to Michael by name, after all!
The Frog brothers don’t interact with Michael much. Edgar calls him “Nosferatu” and “El Vampiro” and some other things, speaking to Sam. But not “Michael.” And Edgar prior to that threatens to stake him. Neither brother uses his given name or any derivations of it. I don’t think Allan even talks to Michael at all.
One meme claims, Michael Emerson is trying really hard not to be the main character in his own life’s story. That’s a fair point. He goes with the flow when faced with peer pressure, and stops questioning Star about what’s happening to him, as soon as she starts kissing him.
Really, he should have known by then, anyway. A little clueless. Hello, you tried to attack your brother, and you can fly (given, without as much control as the others later show), and your reflection was semi-transparent.
He doesn’t do a whole lot to try and solve his dilemma on his own, either. It isn’t until his brother calls the Frogs (God that sounds funny), that he swoops in to rescue Star and Laddie. He’s the one who ends up confronting David, toward the end, but David initiates that.
I guess the most aggressive moments Michael has, are when Star catches his eye, and he follows her through the boardwalk fairgrounds, and when he punches David in the jaw, for nearly leading him over the edge of a cliff. Everything else just kind of happens TO Michael, not BECAUSE of Michael.
Well, anyway. I guess my point with that, is that it makes sense that in the realm of Rock is Undead, my Lost Boys-inspired rockstar vampire series, the character Jared who at least looks like Michael (but maybe with more green in his eyes), is the focal character. The narration is tinted through the lens of his perspective, even if it isn’t first-person.
Dorian (David) exerts himself all over the place, often pulling Jared out of his comfort zone in the process, or at least giving him adequate temptation to step out of it, on his own.
Haven (Star) is the one who introduces Dorian and Jared. She’s Dorian’s girl first, but they have an open relationship. Noting Jared’s resemblance to one of Dorian’s exes, she thinks Dorian might be interested in him, and spills her beer on Jared’s date, to give herself an excuse to interact with their group.
This somewhat teases the storyline in the movie, where Star winds her way through the crowds and to the back of David’s bike, where David meets Michael for the first time. Both of them look Michael over appraisingly.
That’s one example of where I see the erotic ambiguity. Sure, maybe David is sizing up a possible threat, or potential new recruit, but his expression could be read any number of ways. There’s a similarity to his look, and Star’s. They’re both a little teasing.
And Star may ride with David. He may behave possessively toward her. Perhaps they had a previous fling? But we don’t see them express much physical intimacy, beyond David assisting her getting onto his motorcycle. David gets closer to Michael than he does to Star.
Sure, he purportedly wanted Star to kill Michael, but what relationship isn’t without its conflicts?
LOL.
The movie is definitely ripe for an interpretation through the prism of queer theory, like the essay I wrote as an undergrad. I wish I still had a copy. Maybe somewhere, in my files.
Okay, I said this would be short and have already rambled quite a bit.
Then, I went back through it and added more details.
One last tangent:
Somehow, this post has also reminded me of something I once read online, about trying to keep your own narrative interesting, as if you’re the main character someone else is watching or reading about. I guess that’s from pondering how Michael may not meet that expectation in a traditional sense.
Maybe you’ll write a memoir, or someone will pen your biography, or friends or family will continue to recount your various adventures long after you are gone. You might have people you’re not in contact with anymore, even now, who mention you in their stories from time to time. Could be people you are still in touch with, tell others about you, in dramatic fashion, either in your presence or not.
Geekishly tallying dialogue in an older vampire movie doesn’t seem like main character energy on the surface, but it was kinda fun. Gave me an excuse to watch it yet again.
It was a little glitchy when the grandfather pointed out the second shelf in the fridge labelled “Old Fart” that no one else is allowed to touch. Couple stripes of TV snow.
Perhaps one day yet, I’ll get the extra spicy edition I saw on Amazon. Some kind of box set. Very cool packaging. And then handle the discs very, VERY carefully.
As if they were stunningly-beautiful vampires.
On the topic of maintaining an interesting life, I leave you with this:
Stay wild inside.
All the Bright and Sparkly Things 
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