Believe it or not, I found that photo surfing Pexels, and it’s actually pretty perfect!
I have resolved to donate almost all of my clothes.
What made me the saddest was bagging up all my cute lingerie I had collected, just because, just to feel pretty, that I would sometimes sleep in, when I wanted to feel *extra.*
But it’s all too big.
EXCEPT FOR… the hot pink satin corset I bought almost 20 years ago and didn’t have the heart to part with. Now, I wish I’d kept the black and white one, too, that I used as “bridal lingerie,” the year I was an undead bride. Under the costume.
I may not even have photos left of that particular Halloween.
I have an old black and white photo of me (appropriately) in the black and white corset,but nothing of me in the dress, veil, etc., holding the matching bouquet.
OH ALTHOUGH… the dress itself is in part documented, because my neighbor wore it to a book release event when we all dressed up as part of a vampire wedding party and went to Barnes and Noble. I have photos of that. So, there is that.
But yes. Still waiting on the raincoat (with its flashy hot pink satin lining) to fit, but I can get into the corset. I’ll have to see how well the two pinks match.
If I’m not mistaken, I think even back in the day, I had to hook the thing all the way up then kind of squirm into it. It doesn’t tie. So, no strings. Get it? It has hook and eye closures, like a bra. And that’s a lot of up and down your back, to try and get your arms and hands to cooperate with. I suppose lacing would have been even more so? Trying to knot it behind yourself.
There’s room to tighten it, from how it fits now, and it is a little snug across my belly. So even if I lose some more weight, it will still work for a bit. Hallelujah! Not sure what occasion might prompt wearing it, but hey. At least we have it as an option.
My Tipsy Elves brand Christmas Sweater, the sleeves are GINORMOUS. Donating that.
Barely worn. VERY heavy knit, super warm. A little too warm, indoors.
Most of my clothes will have to be washed before they hit the donation circuit.
So many clothes.
But it will be good to start fresh.
I’m working on gathering the nerve to donate the sweaters I bought toward the end of winter. Don’t think they’ll fit next season. Some were a bit big to begin with.
Even the top I wore today is big, along with all the cute tie dye t-shirts I picked up not long ago. I’ll at least keep those through the end of summer, I think. Just so I don’t have to start from square one with things to wear to work. And I am hanging onto my Marilyn Monroe tee, which was big even when I bought it, as something to sleep in, if nothing else. It’s very pretty.
And my two hoodies. The NIN one and the one from Self Care is for Everyone. Planning on washing those soon, and trying them on again. I imagine they’re going to fit like they were boyfriend-borrowed. I’m okay with that. I like the idea of dating myself.
That may SOUND like I am keeping quite a bit, but I assure you, there are SO many things that are going out the door. All but one dress– the one I got for Mother’s Day. And so on.
I will probably suck it up and add the winter sweaters to the pile. They just look so cute in the closet!!! But so will smaller clothes, as I gradually buy a little here and there.
Depending on where I’m setting the goalpost, if it was just to get back to my weight from about 20 years ago, or down to what would actually be considered healthy, I still have a ways to go. But I’ll keep tryin.
I suppose I ought to just keep going to keep going.
It’s definitely just for me, this time. No one particular person on the horizon that I am aiming to get into better shape for. And I’m okay with that, for the most part. Maybe that will help the changes become more permanent.
Little by little, making improvements. Not just along those lines. Trying to jumpstart my creativity, too, and self-care, in general. Getting back to things that incite passion. Cooking, etc.
But I find myself really sad suddenly that the day is ending. I had some low points earlier, too, likely from improper sleep. Had some yummy restaurant food. That was fun. I don’t know.
Nothing feels like enough. That probably reflects an embedded notion that *I* am not enough. Or else, difficulties with maintaining a grateful perspective. I will keep working on that, but I will also bear in mind that I’m only human, and that I likely won’t be 100% optimistic 100% of the time.
Okay. It’s late, but I’m very hungry. So I’m gonna have a lil somethin.
Then, some creativity, then some reading, then some sleep.
All the Bright and Sparkly Things 
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